YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN 2009 WHEN.....

1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or myspace.

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

6.) Your boss doesn;t even have the ability to do your job.

8.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

7.) You consider safe driving qualities to be texting your BFF while eating.

8.) You use LOL in everyday conversations.

10.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

11.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

12.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

13.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

14.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

LOL When I first read this I laughed my ass off. Unfortunatly it's not mine.


Ways to Annoy the Na’vi

by Essence of Gold

#1 Wear the seeds of their sacred trees as false moustaches.

#2 Insist they stay totally still so that you can use their little phosphorescent spots as reading lights.

#3 Hang around their tree-village wearing a checked shirt and holding a large axe. It makes them nervous.

#4 Shred leaves absently as you speak. Snap off a twig and twirl it idly between your fingers.

#5 Walk through the forest exclaiming at every other bush you pass. Stop for quarter-hour intervals to examine a ‘really interesting pebble’. When they complain, insist that you are merely ‘feeling the forest around you’.

#6 Declare that their tails are useless and only there for show, while balancing precariously over a dizzying void.

#7 As you watch Tsu’tey train, remark loudly, ‘you know, I think Jake has the edge!’ and vice-versa when watching Jake. Laugh when they snap whatever they’re holding.

#8 Gather large handfuls of leaves, and hand them to Neytiri. When she asks you what they’re for, stare pointedly at her body.

#9 Smoke. Ask Mo’at where she keeps her marijuana.

#10 When they are putting on their war paint, lunge at random people with a wet sponge, insisting that there’s a smudge you absolutely must fix. Use up all their paint and offer them felt tips.

#11 Gaze fixedly at Neytiri as she hangs opposite you in her hammock. Wait until she turns huffily away. When she ventures to turn over again, she will find that you are now staring through a large pair of binoculars. Vary your routine with various types of eyewear – novelty glasses, telescopes and a long periscope all the way up from the forest floor work well.

#12 ‘Accidentally’ tread on every single tail that you pass on your way to your seat around the fire. Every. Single. Tail.

#13 Swing Neytiri’s hammock, veeerrry gently, but getting faster and faster, when she is trying to go to sleep. Time the seconds until she snaps, then complain she has ‘anger issues’.

#14 Play rap music. Loudly.

#15 Sing along (badly) to the rap music, incorporating words of the N’avi language. Claim you are using it as a ‘learning aid’.

#16 Abandon your Avatar body at odd moments; in the middle of one of Neytiri’s nature-hugging lectures or whenever there is any work to be done are good times. Of course you weren’t slacking, the evil general terminated your connection suddenly, risking your life and sanity! They should be sympathetic!

It's not mine but still funny as hell!!!